50 things you can control

Unfortunately there are many things, we can’t control: Sudden rain, public transportation, traffic jam, your past, what others may think about us, how others may behave towards us and relationships may end—the list is infinite.

But how often are we letting things, we can't control, ruin our whole day?

Let's say, that you arrive late to work, because your bus never arrives? You will probably already be stressed and moody and you'll start your day, with all this negative energy which you'll bring with you throughout your day and therefore, also affect the people around you.

When you bring out negative energy, the world will respond with negative energy as well. When your mind is already negative, negative things will happen. And how's that? Because your mind will unconsciously focus on the negatives and you will automatically wait for something to brighten you up, something to save your day, but that never comes, because your negative subconscious mind, isn't allowing positive things to happen.... All because that stupid bus didn't arrive as planned – all because of something out of your control.

Ough....

And now, let me try to put it another way: If you let something out of your control, control you, you are not taking the full responsibility of your day. Of course it's super annoying, when you show up late to work, but there's nothing you could do about it. So why let it ruin your entire day? Why not get the best out of the extra free-time? You could call a friend, meditate, talk to the stranger beside you (who knows, what they could bring to your life?), read your book and so on.

Wouldn’t it be way more effective, if we focused on all things we can control instead? Maybe that could bring a spark in you and maybe even let your day be more exciting?

Things you can control:

1. How many times you smile today. 2. How much effort you exert at work. 3. Your level of honesty. 4. How well you prepare. 5. How you act on your feelings 6. How often you say “thank you.” 7. How much money you spend on luxuries. 8. Whether or not you give someone the benefit of the doubt. 9. How you interpret situations. 10. Whether or not you compete with people around you. 11. How often you notice and appreciate small acts of kindness. 12. Whether you listen or wait to talk. 13. When you walk away from a conversation. 14. How nice you are to yourself in your head. 15. Whether you think positive or negative thoughts. 16. Whether or not you form expectations of people 17. The type of food you eat. 18. When you answer someone’s question—or email or call. 19. How much time you spend worrying. 20. How many new things you try 21. How much exercise you get. 22. How many times you swear in traffic. 23. Whether or not you plan for the weather. 24. How much time you spend trying to convince people you’re right. 25. How often you think about your past. 26. How many negative articles you read. 27. The attention you give to your loved ones when you see them. 28. How much you enjoy the things you have right now 29. Whether or not you communicate something that’s on your mind. 30. How clean or uncluttered you keep your space. 31. What books you read. 32. How well you network at social events. 33. How deeply you breathe when you experience stress. 34. How many times you admit you don’t know something—and then learn something new. 35. How often you use your influence to help people instead of focusing on building your influence. 36. When you ask for help. 37. Which commitments you keep and cancel. 38. How many risks you take. 39. How creative you are in your thinking. 40. How clear you are when you explain your thoughts. 41. Whether you act on a new plan or act on your existing one. 42. How much information you get before you make a decision. 43. How much information you share with people. 44. Whether you smoke or how much you drink 45. Whether or not you judge other people. 46. Whether you smell good or bad 47. How much you believe of what other people say. 48. How quickly you try again after you fall. 49. How many times you say “I love you.” 50. How much rest you get at night.

Whenever I start to obsess about something, I can't control, I pick one of these focal points to obsess over instead. It sounds easier than it is, I know. But one thing I've learned is; Minor changes in my thinking, lead to major changes in my reality.

I hope that next time, you get overwhelmed by things you can't control, you take a deep breath and focus on the things you can control instead. Good luck! And be aware of the magic behind this.